In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
