My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
it hurts more in the daytime
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
My pussy is not your playground.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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