Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
