So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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