omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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