i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
