party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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