think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
