Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
