Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
