We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
