how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
