I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Randomize