she looked like the bat from fern gully.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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