Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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