Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
