Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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