I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
