and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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