My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
