I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
