You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
