im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
