how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
