i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
