she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
