kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
