I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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