Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize