Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
