Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
accomplished twins. life is a go
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
