Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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