she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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