:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
