So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
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