Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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