Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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