ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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