oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
