just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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