Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
