Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
