Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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