I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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