It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
