I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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