It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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