Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I forgot how hot balto sounded
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
