fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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