what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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