We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
